The Potluck Guy

I was invited to a potluck / barbeque this weekend and participated in a lengthy discussion on various spiritual topic. I found it interesting how people were interacting in the conversations. One guy talked about war, while the other guy was discussing the law of attraction. There was a physicist who was determined to make us believe his point of view on a subject. Very interesting energy.

Then I was approached by this young guy that asked what I meant about the comment I made which was," If you want to know where you are going in your life, just look at the friends you hand out with." He couldn't understand that by hanging around his friends that he would not get any farther then where they have been, or are going in their lives. If you listen to someone that is negative all the time, and you believe that there is no issues with that, then you will most likely adopt these beliefs as well and end up repeating them.

But what happened next was very good for me as I will explain later. He proceeded to tell me that he was separated from his girlfriend and the had a child, but we still friends. And did not know where to go with that because he felt that it was not going anywhere and why did he hang around with her at all. So I started asking him questions like, " Where do you see it going? What do you want out of this relationship/ friendship? Are you hanging on to the hope that she will eventually change her mind and take you back? Is this blocking you from moving forward in your own life?

He said that he wanted to be part of his child's life. As I pointed out that he can still be with is child but does she have to be in the picture all the time? Anyway, it got to a point that he was feeling some anger coming up. And I said to him, that this was a good thing because he was finally getting in touch with his emotions and that if he really wanted the answer to his questions, he needed to look at his anger. He then stood up and walked away. Which did not surprise me because males have a challenge looking at their emotions, because they probably have not been taught how to deal with them and it is too scary, so they stuff them inside again and again.

Then, two days ago, I went for coffee with a good friend of mine, that is a male but has done a ton of inner work on himself and understands the process of healing emotions. As we were talking, the conversation turned and he kept on telling me all the things I was doing wrong in my life from his perspective of course. As I could feel myself withdrawing slowly, by not responding to his words, I felt myself getting deeply frustrated and angry. I knew I had to get away from him so that I could figure out what the heck was triggering me.

I told him that I was heading home, he wanted me to go for a walk and I was not in the mood. So I gave him a short hug and got in my truck and drove off. I was in shock as to why I was feeling so angry and could not put my finger on it. Until I got home. I realized that I was being shown by my guides and Spirit that when I was talking to this young guy at the potluck, and he ended up getting angry from the questions I kept asking him, what was happening with my good friend was the exact same thing.

I got to experience what I was projecting on to that potluck guy. I immediately called my friend and apologized and said that I got the message from that teaching moment that we shared . It was to show me how I am using my words to ask questions with other people, that I should be asking myself to get to the cause of my own anger issues. I told him that I felt like he was only focusing on all the stuff that I do that is wrong and that he never focuses on the things I do right. I felt extremely criticized. 

He asked me who criticized me as a child. And I answered my mother. And I also told him that this is what I've been feeling with all my bosses lately. I feel they criticize everything I do. And it makes me feel like I'm not good enough at my jobs so I end up leaving all the time. So I', grateful today that I experienced that chat with that potluck guy because he might never know what gift of insight he gave me. And that's OK.  It has shifted my view on how I treat people when they are asking for help. It's about learning to communicate in a different way. Perhaps focus on what they are doing right, and help them to see how they might be able to improve it from there.

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Money causes dot dot dot

" Your perfect just the way you are, I wouldn't change you if I could." Ricky Skaggs

I listen to this song practically everyday. To remind me that Great Spirit has made me perfect just the way I am. I love hearing it sung to me. I was watching a program last night with an interview with Alanis Morrisette . I can so relate to her and how she says it made her uncomfortable having people watching her perform. I'm the same. I play music a little and I play on my own. I have an incredible talent that not many people know about. I've always believed that if I would have had music in my school when I was a kid, I would have taken of with it and made something with my music gift. 

The money was the issue in my childhood. Money has a way of stopping people to do a lot of things. Imagine what we would do if money was not in the picture. What if money had no say in the matter. If we just gave everything. Everything was free to have. I could go into this store and say, I want that piano or guitar. Or I want to drive this car this week and this truck next week and totally respecting and being responsible beings. And I want to travel to this place and stay there for a whole month and it was free to eat and play and have the most fun ever. How fun would the world be? Music everywhere you went. That's a world I want.

I think money stops us from being happy. It makes up stories in our minds that we end up believing about ourselves that's really not true at all. It sets a standard of truth that stops ours spirit to take flight and be set free. Our level of love for each other without money would reach beyond ourselves, because the first thoughts that would come up would not be those of, " I wonder how much money she/he has?

Jealousy for each other is another energy that money carries around it. It creates huge wars. People believe they have the right to take another persons life because they are jealous of something they have. Money has creates massive issues on this planet. It's causes environments issues, political issues, food issues, drug issues, even to the point that we use money to try to find another planet like us out there, hoping that we can get to it.  Believe me , there are no other planets like the landfilled infested, chemically plagued planet that we have created for the humans that live here.

Money is the cause of the everything that we have created and destroyed on this planet. It's a damn shame. And the kids are the ones that are going to have to clean up this mess, if we survive this one. It will take something really massive and big to get people to realize where we stand right now. People are in huge denial. And we are all perfect just the way we are.

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Shifting hate into love

I will be starting a second part-time job in a week or so. I have never had to do two jobs in order to provide for my needs. The place I work now is packed at lunch time. The line up is continuous for two hours. They are making great money. I get paid eleven dollars an hour for my hard work which I love to do. I excel in the kitchen. For the money they are making everyday, I would not trade my time for it. I realized this today. If I had a choice to take their place of working 7 days a week for a whole year without time off  instead of working for eleven dollars an hour and get to do something in nature each week, I'd choose nature.


It looks like we are needing to experience deep poverty and extreme riches in order to learn the profound lessons. It seems that the only alternative to getting out of poverty victim roles is to work your behind off and if your lucky enough you may enjoy one or two weeks a year for fun. What has happened to the people of this planet that we value dollar amounts more then we value the integrity of a human being? If I was paid for my integrity, I'd be worth millions.


I question myself as to why I'm in this job. What is it that I am meant to learn from working for a boss that is extremely picky, has no tolerance for mistakes and judges the performance of a new employee in one day? Perhaps I'm the one that is picky in areas of my life, or that I have no tolerance for mistakes, and I judge the performance of people in my life. Maybe I am being mirrored back what it is I need to look at. I have been aware lately that I seem to focus on self hating. Like I'm noticing that I'll project thoughts that frustrate me and I ends up in a hate energy. Like I hate having to work for so little pay or I hate that people litter on the ground still ( it baffles me still that people chose not to respect the planet we live on it's like we have all decided that the Earth is a giant landfill site for our emotional trash) Oh just got a great idea. ..I could go on but I will shift the hate into thoughts of love. I have to remember to love everything all the time. And it is very challenging to do.


So many people live in jobs that they hate. They hate the boss, the workers they work with, the work they have to do, the time they have to spend away from their family to provide them food , shelter and clothing. It's a love/hate relationship that never seems to end. I feel that it has a lot to do with self hate. I have to start there and turn the self hate talk, into self-love talk. I know deep in my heart I feel love for everything, and it saddens me when I get into this hate place. I don't feel like myself. But it comes up so that I can work on what is causing this emotion to fester.


So this new idea is a great project to help pass the winter time. I should have started this spring, since it involves outdoor activity. I'd better get cracking. Once I have it completed, I will share it with the world. This is what happens when I share my feelings out loud. I get to the core of inspiration that linger deep inside me. I will also have to manifest the money for it.


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